Having nothing else to write about at the moment and being new to keeping a blog for no reason other than to have a blog, I’ve decided to use today’s Daily Prompt from the Daily Post.
It’s been said a thousand times before and a thousand times for eloquently but people need to have fear. I don’t mean this in that people need to be afraid all of their lives but fear is what keeps us going many times. It keeps up making the right decisions about what to do with our lives from deciding things like that it would be a bad idea to grab the tray out of the oven with your bare hands to some of the biggest decisions of our lives. Fear is usually not alone though. It can be mixed with will, determination, and love to name a few. It becomes the fear of losing your freedom, the fear of failing in the things that mean to most to you, or the fear of neglecting those things that you hold most dear.
Now that I’ve bored you to the point where you’ve already gone looking for another blog to read, I’m going to write about my two biggest fears. Both are huge and life shaping and yet one is tangible and the other is rather intangible.
Since I was a child, I’ve been afraid of the dark. I know that this is pretty common but it is my biggest fear. I’ve worked over many other fears throughout my life such as heights or snakes but the dark has always and likely always will scare me. However, to be more accurate it’s less the fear of the dark and more the fear of what could be in the dark. My overactive imagination tends to get the best of me and in the darkness, the happiest thoughts can turn into the scariest. Thought’s of kittens turn into that one creepy girl from the Grudge crawling out of my closet. And my mind can jump around so much that these thoughts can come from nowhere as if my own brain is trying to mess with me. It probably doesn’t help that I also have a love of horror movies and scary games. I’m just glad that I have a smartphone now so that I can always have a flashlight.
My biggest fear is something a bit more interesting and possibly harder to understand depending on what kind of person you are. I am incredibly afraid of dying alone. I suppose that most people would be afraid of this to some degree or another but for some reason it really effects me harder than anything else. Sometimes it makes it hard for me to fall asleep at night or keeps me from doing the things I like or the things I need to do. When people talk about paralyzing fear, the feeling that I get from the thought of dying alone is what I think of. In the end though, it’s likely just by me over-thinking my life and my imagination running wild in the worst ways possible. At least, that’s what I hope.